It’s now 3 months since I started my blog, so I’m halfway through my 6 month experiment.
I’m enjoying the process, feel insights are emerging and I sense repeating themes in the blog which lead me to think what’s important to me is becoming clearer. I think this is because I believe in the “we teach best what we most need to learn” philosophy of Richard Bach. This is not to say that my intention was/is necessarily about teaching anything.
I trust that putting my thoughts, ponderings and ramblings out there will help give me clarity about this next phase of my life and perhaps give you a perspective or be a spark to propel, elevate or deepen something of importance no matter who you are, what you do or where you are in your life.
During these past 3 months, I feel I’ve made progress; that progress has been at the same time surprising, frustrating, steady, enlightening and catalysing. So what reflections have I had and how are things going?
- I’m allowing myself time and space to really recover from my back injury. This took a while to settle into. As my impatience initially got worse and I got more frustrated, the slower the healing seemed to happen. Now that I’ve surrendered to the healing process I feel better and am enjoying Pilates twice a week, have done 3 hour Yoga and Qi Gong workshops and am about to book a mini fitness retreat to kick start my return to regular exercise.
- I’m realising my heart is ready for new challenges. I use the word challenges on purpose. I’m ready to be surprised, excited, opened up and “put to the test” physically, emotionally and spiritually, although I’ve no idea what that looks like – yet.
- I’m ready to let go of the labels I’ve given to the work I’ve been doing. Those labels have included leadership and team development, facilitation, coaching, training, teaching, consulting, strategy, building high performing teams and personal development, to name just a few. The labels have come about over time in response to one of my pet hate questions” So what do you do?” I will now consider who I am and who I want to be versus emphasise what I do. This feels like a shift but I’m willing to acknowledge it may just be semantics. And in any case what I do might be changing.
- I’m being kinder to myself around my diet. I do eat a mainly plant based diet, have recently cut out dairy, gluten and sugar (this is an experiment to see how I feel versus any particular diet) and yes, that does mean no milk in my coffee and no cake; no drama so far! This also means I’m eating out less as it’s easier to prepare meals I want and it means I’m spending less money on meals.
These are all really positive insights and whilst on the one hand not earth shattering nor surprising, I do feel they set a solid foundation for my next phase of thinking. The main insight or should it really be called the main statement of the bleeding obvious, is that all of these insights, decisions or whatever, had to come from within me and not from something or someone outside of me and I needed the time and space to realise that. So I’ve had my Dorothy moment and no ruby slippers were required. I knew it all along.
I’m still hesitant in many areas.
- I have a reluctance to book any adventures big or small. There is still a small percentage of that reluctance connected to my back rehab and some percentage connected to money but the rest is indecision and lack of clarity; should I or shouldn’t I? Is this right for me? Do I really want to do this? etc. etc. The only thing I have 100% committed to, is skiing in Montana, USA in February 2020.
- I’m unclear what kind of work I want to contribute to and whether it will be an evolution of the stuff I currently do, something completely different or a mix of the two. I’m open to both.
- I’m still isolating myself and spend most of the time in my own company. I’m OK with this as I feel I’m “cocooning”, waiting to emerge at some point soon. However I do from time to time feel lonely.
- You may recall I set intentions this year not resolutions (blog post about that here From Resolutions to Intentions) and against those intentions I’m doing fairly well. Yes there’s been a lot of pondering, reflecting and some might say navel gazing, but I do feel it’s been necessary, what I needed and productive. Some days I feel as if I take two steps forward and one step back. Most days there is enough progress.
I’ve also got one of those “won’t go away” ideas lurking in my mind that I suspect might emerge and evolve into a big part of my future, who I am and how I contribute in the world. We shall see; I may even put it out there soon.
As we approach the halfway point of 2019, I encourage you to revisit your intentions or resolutions.
- How are you doing?
- What have you done?
- What have you learnt?
- What have you not done?
- What needs a reboot or refocus?
- What can you celebrate?
Please do share you ponderings and celebrations in the comments box, in doing so you might inspire others to do their own ponderings and share as well.